|Season 1, episode 14|
|Regina examines Stewart|
March 29, 2006
Hot Water is the fourteenth episode of Out of Practice.
Regina and Ben come in and Regina tells Oliver he should have come running with them. He wouldn't because it's Valentine's Day. He has a date with Lola. He tells them all about his plans. Regina says she's tired of Valentine's Day. It's too corporate. Ben says it's the worst day of the year for a couple's counselor. Regina picks up the paper and sees that the restaurant where Oliver was supposed to eat is closed because there was a mob hit there. He goes to make some calls to find a new place to eat.
Stewart and Crystal enter the apartment, wearing a tie and a shirt with hearts on them. They're excited about Valentine's Day. Crystal brought cookies with everyone's name on them. Ben picks one up and asks who Mr. Sweetbottom is. Stewart covers that it's their UPS guy, but Regina tells him just to take the cookie. When he does so, he calls out in pain. He tells Ben he just tweaked his back at the gym. He had no one spotting him. Regina says he hasn't been spotted at the gym in years. The doorbell rings and it's Lydia with Monty. Regina warns her to cover her eyes and she asks why just as she sees Stewart and Crystal. Lydia hands over the leash and says she can't stay long. Crystal stops her and offers her the cookie with her name on it. She tries to decline, but ultimately accepts. As she sits down, she tells Stewart she got a call from La Cucina, confirming their standing reservation for Valentine's Day. She offers Stewart the table since she doesn't have plans, but he says they're eating at home. He then rushes out, saying they should take the dog on a walk. Crystal wants to stop upstairs to put on his Cupid's outfit first.
Ben goes to get ready to work, but first tells his mom that Oliver would love La Cucina. Oliver comes out of the kitchen saying he has nothing for Valentine's Day. Lydia tells him about La Cucina and he says it'd be great and thanks her. She tells him 8:00. As Lydia gets on the elevator, she confirms the reservation for herself and Oliver.
Regina asks Nurse Erin what's next in the ER. Erin gives her the chart of a huge crybaby. Regina goes behind the curtain to find Stewart in the fetal position. Regina asks him about the pain. His back is in spasm. She asks him out it happens and warms him not to lie about it happening at the gym. She says whatever he was doing, he needs to avoid, but he says he can't avoid it, especially on Valentine's Day. Crystal wanted to start the day on a romantic note and he got a little ambitious. Regina leaves to get something for the nausea. He says there's no nausea, but she meant for her. She then goes to Erin and orders x-rays over Stewart's objections. He insists that she just numb his back and let him go. He pretends to be cured, so she drops his keys on the ground and tells him he can go if he can pick them up.
Ben answers the phone and it's Stewart. He needs Ben to go upstairs and tell Crystal that he's at the hospital with a patient because she's waiting for him. As Ben goes to do that, He passes Oliver, who is ready for his date. Ted then comes out of the kitchen and asks Oliver if he's joining them. They're watching the remake of Planet of the Apes. Oliver says he has a date. As he puts in the DVD, Oliver whispers to Ben to promise to have the place sprayed in the morning. Ben says he's had enough Valentine's Day stuff with his patients. He wants a nice, quiet night. The doorbell rings and Ted thinks it's the pizza, so he goes to get it. But it's actually Lydia, there to pick up Oliver for dinner. Ben is delighted at the confusion, but Oliver is upset. He tries to play it off.
Ben is upstairs knocking, but Crystal doesn't answer the door. She's singing. Ben follows the noise to the bathroom. She's in a bubble bath. Ben averts his eyes and gets her attention so he can deliver the message. She tells him to be careful with the doorknob, but it's too late and he breaks it off. He's trapped in the bathroom with her. He goes to get her a towel, but there isn't one in the bathroom. Ben pulls out his phone to call, but when Ben sees the underwear Stewart got her, he drops his phone into the bath water. She retrieves it with her foot, but it's ruined. She suggests that he dry it with her blowdryer, but that starts to push away the bubbles.
Oliver is on the phone with Lola, telling her he's a bit delayed, but he'll be there. Lydia comes in and asks him who's on the phone. He lies and says the restaurant is overbooked and it'll be an hour wait. Lydia asks who he talked to, because the owner is a patient of hers and promised they'd have the best table. He lies and says Doug. Lydia says she'll talk to the owner about Doug.
In the living room, Lydia and Ted talk about the divorce. He tries to flirt with her, but she doesn't take the bait.
Oliver takes a hot towel out of the microwave and holds it to his forehead for a moment. He then goes out to the living room, telling his mom he's ready to go while coughing. She feels his forehead and proclaims him sick. He says she should go so she won't catch it. Lydia says she'll nurse him back to health.
Stewart has a muscle inflammation. He'll be find, but he has muscle relaxants and Crystal needs to alternate heat and ice. Stewart says he'll handle it himself, but Regina tells him to let Crystal help him. Stewart doesn't want to ruin the nice image of him for Crystal. She doesn't want her to think he's getting old, but Regina says he already is old. He's the guy Crystal fell in love with. She sends him out the door to go be with Crystal.
Lydia has Oliver tucked in on the couch. He tries to send her away again. Ted watches and says he's in awe. He wishes he were as good a parent as she is. He has a boa constrictor. Lydia finally agrees to leave with the promise that Oliver will call her in the morning. As Lydia opens the door to leave, she sees Lola there. Lola's upset because Oliver kept her waiting for an hour and he's not even dressed. Lydia figures out what has happened. He asks her to give him and his mom a few minutes. He admits what happened. She admits that she heard what she wanted to hear. Oliver says she just has to say the word and he'll send Lola home so they can have a nice dinner. She tells him to cut the crap. He then pulls off his robe to reveal that he's been wearing his suit underneath it. He takes the roses and leaves. Lydia goes to leave, but Ted says Ben should be back soon and offers to freshen her drink. He way overfills her wine glass. They sit on opposite ends of the couch. He continues to come onto her. While she talks about how horribly her day has gone, he inches closer. When she notices, she shoves him back. He's had a crush on her since 10th grade. Lydia agrees to stay and watch the movie with him until Ben comes back. He has to stay on the other side of the couch though.
Ben is working on the knob to get them out of the bathroom. Crystal says it's funny that he hates Valentine's Day and still ended up with a naked lady. He says he doesn't hate it, but his patients want love to be magical on this one arbitrary day. Crystal says she hasn't always been like this. Last Valentine's Day was sadder. The next day, Stewart called her at home for the first time. You never know when your luck will change. They then hear Stewart outside the bathroom. Ben explains why he's in there with Crystal. Stewart goes to try to ram the door, but hurts himself. He slides his phone under the door so Ben can call a locksmith and an ambulance.
Ted is explaining Planet of the Apes to Lydia. She says it's good, but no Logan's Run as she moves closer. Ben comes in the door and wakes Ted out of his dream. He apologizes to Ted, but Ted just cuddles back up with the pillow that was Lydia in his dream.
- Christopher Gorham as Ben Barnes
- Paula Marshall as Regina Barnes
- Ty Burrell as Oliver Barnes
- Jennifer Tilly as Crystal
- Henry Winkler as Stewart Barnes
- Stockard Channing as Lydia Barnes
Notes and TriviaEdit
- This episode was produced as the sixteenth episode, but aired as the fourteenth.
A complete overview of this episode's crew can be found here.
|Out of Practice Episodes|
|#02||"We Wanna Hold Your Hand"||#10||"Guilt Trip"||#18||"Losing Patients"|
|#03||"And I'll Cry If I Want To"||#11||"New Year's Eve"||#19||"Doctors Without Bidders"|
|#04||"The Truth About Nerds & Dogs"||#12||"Yours, Mine or His?"||#20||"If These Floors Could Talk"|
|#05||"Brothers Grim"||#13||"Model Behavior"||#21||"The Lady Doth Protest Too Much"|
|#06||"The Heartbreak Kid"||#14||"Hot Water"||#22||"Breaking Up Is Hard to Do. And Do. And..."|
|#07||"Key Ingredients"||#15||"You Win Some, You Use Some"|
|#08||"The Wedding"||#16||"Doctor of the Year"|
|Out of Practice Episodes|